I'm trying so hard to shit out a happy blog and not come across as a pathetic person but its just not happenin. For a few reasons.
One, school started again! Its spring quarter the first year of college has gone by so fast but im not sure if thats a good thing. I got two A's last quarter, and that raised my gpa, so i'm aiming for 4 A's this quarter. 17 credits is quite a load i suppose. So i quit my job, and check this out, now i have motivation to save for a car, fuck me, in the ass.
Two, my parents wont let me get my license. Cause i will not be brainwashed! and spend all my free time doing things i'll HAVE to do in a decade anyways, why can't i just live as a free spirit during my younger years and not feel so confined when eventually all my choices and any chance of happiness later in life will be stripped away? Beats me.
Three, I spent $550.00 on food this past quarter cause no one would fix me any god damn lunch, but of course my older brother got his lunch fixed every morning, resulting in me being late for class, and no time for me to have a sandwich. SO i tell my dad right, and he doesnt wanna pay me back. My brothers 3 years older than me and doesnt have to pay for shit fuck cock damn cunt penis.
Four, NOTHING IS GOING THE WAY I PLAN.
Five, I cry everyday. I told my mom i think i may be depressed but everytime she blows me off. She calls my bluff (which is indeed not a bluff).
I'm glad i have xanga whenever i need, it doesnt matter if i log on once a month, or everyday, at least its reliable. Sometimes i wonder how i'd feel if the people in my physical life read this, whether i'd feel releived or stressed. Speaking of stress, my heart has like 2 weeks til it fails.
P.S. Theres no way i'll ever be happy, because you made it impossible.
